You Know Your Child Best: A Parent’s Guide to ABA Services
When your child receives Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) services, you aren’t just a passive observer - but an essential part of the treatment team. You have rights, your voice matters, and you are the expert on your child. This post is designed to help you understand those rights, how ethical guidelines support them, and how to advocate for your child every step of the way.
1. Understanding the BACB & What Guides BCBA Conduct
The Behavior Analyst Certification Board (BACB) is the certifying body that oversees the credentialing and ethical standards for BCBA’s (Board Certified Behavior Analysts). The Ethics Code for Behavior Analysts (2022) outlines clear expectations for how behavior analysts treat clients and families.
Some key principles include:
“2.01 Providing Effective Treatment: Behavior analysts prioritize clients’ rights and needs in service delivery. They provide services that are conceptually consistent with behavioral principles, based on scientific evidence, and designed to maximize desired outcomes for and protect all clients, stakeholders, supervisees, trainees, and research participants from harm. Behavior analysts implement non-behavioral services with clients only if they have the required education, formal training, and professional credentials to deliver such services.”
“2.08 Communicating About Services: Behavior analysts use understandable language in, and ensure comprehension of, all communications with clients, stakeholders, supervisees, trainees, and research participants. Before providing services, they clearly describe the scope of services and specify the conditions under which services will end. They explain all assessment and behavior-change intervention procedures before implementing them and explain assessment and intervention results when they are available. They provide an accurate and current set of their credentials and a description of their area of competence upon request.”
“2.09 Involving Clients & Stakeholders: Behavior analysts make appropriate efforts to involve clients and relevant stakeholders throughout the service relationship, including selecting goals, selecting and designing assessments and behavior-change interventions, and conducting continual progress monitoring.”
“2.11 Obtaining Informed Consent: Behavior analysts are responsible for knowing about and complying with all conditions under which they are required to obtain informed consent from clients, stakeholders, and research participants (e.g., before initial implementation of assessments or behavior-change interventions, when making substantial changes to interventions, when exchanging or releasing confidential information or records). They are responsible for explaining, obtaining, reobtaining, and documenting required informed consent. They are responsible for obtaining assent from clients when applicable.”
Behavior Analyst Certification Board. (2020). Ethics code for behavior analysts. https://bacb.com/wp-content/ethics-code-for-behavior-analysts/
If your BCBA isn’t following these ethical codes, it’s more than “just a bad fit” - it may be an ethical violation.
2. You ARE the Expert on Your Child
No one knows your child the way you do. Your values, your routines, and your child’s history matter. While BCBAs bring training and clinical experience, you bring lived experience, and that perspective must be central to the treatment process.
A Collaborative ABA Program Should Include:
Goals that align with your family’s priorities
Strategies that make sense in your home and community
Ongoing communication about what’s working (and what isn’t).
When in doubt, remember: Your child’s needs should never be overridden by a rigid protocol or some else’s assumptions. As the parent, you are already exerting physical, mental, and emotional energy (often at or above your capacity). A good behavior plan should be something that works for your child, your home, and is within your capacity to do so!
3. Informed Consent & Saying “No”
Informed Consent isn’t just a signature on a form - it’s a continual process.
I once had a client I believed could start toileting. The parents disagreed with me. When I asked, they explained their child’s needs, how toileting skills were important, but, “not right now”.
We worked on a plan together on the barriers to toileting, and ensured this was something feasible for the family in the home. We discussed other skills we could work on first. We talked about the risks and benefits (long-term and short-term) for their child.
Instead of pushing my beliefs & timeline on the family - I listened and respected their decision. Their child now uses the toilet, but in a way that works for the family, and meets the child where they are at.
You should:
Know what’s being proposed
Understand the risks and benefits
Be given the chance to ask questions
Have the freedom to say “no” or “not right now”
You can decline a strategy, request changes, or pause a plan altogether.
That is your right.
Saying “no” doesn’t make you a difficult parent. It makes you an involved one.
You deserve the same process I outlined in my personal story. And you deserve this for every skill, every worry, and every reservation you have.
4. Disagreeing With Your BCBA
Disagreements happen. But how they are handled matters.
If something feels wrong or uncomfortable:
Ask for clarification in writing
Request a meeting to review data or goals
Share your concerns directly
Ethical BCBA’s will respond without defensiveness. They may also respond with the rationale of how they will support you (if you have reservations) and provide encouragement that resonates with you as the parent. If you are met with dismissal or guilt-tripping, that is a serious red flag. You also have the right to seek a second opinion or request a different provider.
5. Parent Collaboration is an Ethical Requirement
According to the BACB Ethics Code:
“Behavior analysts involve clients and stakeholders throughout the service relationship.”
This Includes:
Regular team meetings (I always recommend a minimum of monthly)
Collaborative goal-setting
Mutual decision making
Culturally responsive practices
If your BCBA isn’t asking for your input - or worse, dismissing it - they’re not just being uncollaborative, they are violating an ethical expectation.
6. Navigating Conflicts or Concerns
If you feel your voice isn’t being heard, here’s what you can do:
Document your concerns - emails, notes from meetings, data requests.
If you are being told that your child must attend 35-40 hours of services to attend or keep attending their ABA program, ask for data & research to support this decision. You should not be coerced into a high number of service hours if it is not in the best interest of your child.
Use the chain of command - request to speak with the supervisors of the BCBA or clinical directors
Know your rights - review the BACB Ethics Code & service agreements of where your child attends services
File a complaint - If you have taken the above action & nothing has changed or an egregious ethics violation occurs, the BACB accepts reports of ethical violations: https://www.bacb.com/ethics-information/
No parent should feel silenced or intimidated when speaking up.
7. Your Child’s Rights
Your child has the right to:
Learn in an affirming, joyful environment
Be treated as a whole person, not just a list of behaviors
Experience teaching strategies that are gentle, effective, and respectful.
Be cautious of:
Programs that prioritize compliance over communication
Rigid schedules with no room for breaks or preferences (especially if your child is attending long hours of services)
Interventions that are not trauma-informed or are distressing to your child
You have the right to speak up when something feels wrong!
Conclusion
Your Voice Belongs at the Table
You are not being “too much”. You’re being your child’s biggest advocate.
When ABA is done well, it’s collaborative, culturally responsive, respectful, and affirming. You deserve a team that listens, learns with you, and honors your role every step of the way.
Resources for Parents:
https://www.bacb.com/ethics-information/ethics-codes/
https://autismnavigator.com/
https://www.wrightslaw.com/
Have Questions about ABA?
If you’re a parent feeling overwhelmed by the terminology or just looking for clear, easy-to-understand explanations, I’m here to help. Use the contact form below to reach out!
*Disclaimer: The views expressed in this blog are my own (Functionally Speaking ABA) and do not reflect the views of UNMC
Resources:
Behavior Analyst Certification Board. (2020). Ethics code for behavior analysts. https://bacb.com/wp-content/ethics-code-for-behavior-analysts/
